One night, I was scrolling through Instagram, passing post after post from gym and fitness influencers — some, I knew and respected — advertising their boot camps or six-week detox programs (often called "resets" for the ones savvy enough to disguise their participation in diet culture), promising to show people the fastest way to get their bodies "summer ready." Along with the right exercise program, these folks also promised to provide the tools to eat "healthy," avoid "junk" food, and ultimately help others lose weight so they can feel confident donning a swimsuit or shorts this summer.
These types of ubiquitous posts are often perpetuated by a thin, able-bodied, privileged, and, more often than not, white individuals — though everyone is part of the fitness game. When these self-described pros really want to drive home the point that they can help people slim down, they add an enticing before and after picture, showing you that this coveted body could be yours if you just buy their program.
In the face of the pervasive amount of messaging that your body needs fixing in order to enjoy the warm weather, I want you to know that it’s all a big, fat lie created by the fitness and wellness industry to keep you feeling like you’re not good enough — and keep their pockets lined with your cash.
Because here's the thing: It’s almost summer and you have a body — so, ta-dah! — your body is already ready!
While the benefits of exercise and movement are bountiful — reduced stress levels, better sleep, and more fulfilling sex just to name a few — the mainstream fitness industry has chosen to focus on movement solely for the benefit of weight loss and as a means to "fix," shrink, and otherwise alter our physiques in pursuit of having the so-called perfect body.
This is one of the many reasons I created the #BodyLiberationProject (and #ThisIsMySummerBody). I spent years of my life obsessing about my body, yo-yo dieting, and trying every new fad diet plan that came on the market. I expended so much energy thinking that I would be happy if I just lost a few more pounds, fit into a certain clothing size, or had a flat stomach or thinner thighs. But the truth is, the more energy we spend focusing on shrinking ourselves and conforming to arbitrarily created standards of beauty, the less energy we have to focus on pursuing our passions, spending time with our loved ones, and actually live life.
If we make self-love or body acceptance conditional on the size of our bodies, we'll never be happy. The reality is that our bodies are constantly changing, and they will never remain exactly the same — they simply weren’t designed that way. And if we base our self-worth on our bodies, we will forever be on an emotional roller coaster of obsession, guilt, and shame.
Still, accepting our bodies unconditionally can be hard. I don’t expect anyone to wake up every day and love everything they see in the mirror. That is a set up for failure. However, we can strive to embrace our bodies, no matter the size, and work to establish an identity that is independent of what our body looks like or how it performs. That’s how we begin to experience actual freedom and acceptance.
Then, once we move beyond our own personal struggles, we can begin to recognize that body positivity is more than just loving our own bodies. Being truly body positive means demanding justice for all bodies — especially the most marginalized ones — while challenging diet culture, fatphobia, and the systemic oppression that prevents people from feeling safe and respected in their bodies. True body positivity involves collectively dismantling diet culture and refusing to participate in its harmful systems by withholding our capital, both social and financial, so that we can begin to hold the fitness and wellness industry accountable for the damage it’s done to our psyches.
I recognize this is a tall order, so while we work on dismantling oppression in all of its forms, here are five tips you can put into practice today to help you build body confidence and work toward radical self-acceptance.
Show yourself compassion
Compassion is the antidote to feelings of guilt, shame, and dissatisfaction about our bodies. Some days we will love what we see and other days we won’t — that’s natural, and it’s human. The trick is to learn to approach the feelings, both good and bad, that come up with curiosity and kindness.
Practice gratitude for yourself as a daily ritual
The way we look is the least interesting thing about us. Practicing gratitude for our qualities, independent of our physicality, helps us realize that we are so much more than our exterior. Our bodies are merely the shell we reside in and allow us to have this human experiences. Show appreciation daily for things that have nothing to do with what you look like.
Stop comparing yourself to others
Comparing our perceived worsts to other people’s best can be downright harmful. But I also encourage you to stop contrasting the you of today with the you of the past. It’s not about what your body used to look like or what it used to be able to do. It’s about embracing the present. We can choose to love what is, instead of comparing ourselves to what used to be.
Buy clothes that fit your current body
An instant way to feel better about our bodies is to wear clothes that fit us well and that we feel comfortable in. Instead of waiting to buy new clothes until we "lose 10 pounds," I encourage my clients to take themselves shopping if they have the resources. You deserve to feel good in your wardrobe today. It doesn’t need to be a reward for weight loss.
Cultivate a deep love affair with yourself
You are whole, complete, and unconditionally loved. Treat yourself with that regard. Celebrate and affirm yourself daily. We can beat ourselves up for all the things we are not, or we can choose to love ourselves with reckless abandon. Guilt and shame hasn’t worked so far, so why not give love a try?
When you realize how magnificent you truly are, you’ll start to care less and less about what other people think about you. We can choose radical appreciation for ourselves regardless of what we look like. Our love for ourselves doesn’t have to be based on conditions or qualifications. We are worthy because we exist. Our self-worth isn’t contingent on the way we look, a number on the scale, or our clothing size.
Flaunt the body you have unapologetically. Wear the swimsuit. Rock the shorts. And sport crop tops all summer long. Thick thighs will be seen, and people will deal. Summer is going to get whatever body you are serving — and what you’re serving is the body you currently reside in. Because #ThisBodyIsSummerReady, and I can’t wait to see you strut!
Chrissy King is a writer, speaker, strength coach, and self-proclaimed truth teller with a passion for intersectional feminism and creating a diverse and inclusive wellness industry. Follow her on Instagram @IamChrissyKing
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