Tech

Chaotic Genius Plays ‘Trombone Champ’ Using a Fleshlight as a Controller

Programmer Kyle Machulis combined the viral song "Cbat" from a Reddit post with a trombone simulator and a Fleshlight-style toy, and the result is hilarious.
Screenshot via Youtube
Screenshot via YouTube

Playing a trombone simulator game with a masturbation sleeve as the controller is as disturbing and hilarious as one might imagine, especially when it’s to the tune of the viral Reddit sensation “Cbat” by Hudson Mohawke. 

To demonstrate this principle, programmer and teledildonics developer Kyle Machulis used an old Fleshlight-style sleeve to fuck out the tune on a pole in his workshop.  

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Trombone Champ, a game by indie developer Holy Wow, is a bit like Guitar Hero if the notes were farts and your avatar was a Nintendo Mii character. Videos of people playing the game have gone viral in the last week or so, because the game is so hilariously awkward. The only thing that could make it more awkward is playing it with a fucktoy, so naturally, that’s what Machulis has done. 

“Cbat” is a song that went massively viral this month after a Redditor revealed that he’d been having sex with his (now ex) girlfriend to the song, and could not orgasm without it. The song is decidedly not a fuck jam.

Machulis did it by modifying a nearly 20-year-old, defunct sex toy called the Interactive Fleshlight, which uses air pressure inside of the sleeve to move the cursor up and down on the slider that controls what notes are played. Machulis told me the process of putting this together took about 30 minutes, and most of that was just setting up the camera to record it. 

In his “Cbat” performance, the notes start high, then gradually crash to stay low. “The device itself seems to make the cursor go more down than up. I am not particularly sure why,” Machulis told me. Tiny air leaks in the cap that controls pressure might have made it less predictable. The biggest challenge, Machulis said, was “figuring out if there was anything that would cause the device to react reliably. Never really got to the point of being able to do that,” he said. 

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The Interactive Fleshlight was released in the early 2000s by a company called Citouch (before the founder of the company that makes the official Fleshlight registered the trademark name in 2008). According to Machulis’ review of the device in 2008, the Interactive Fleshlight was one of the few masturbatory sleeves on the market that acted as a controller for a game, with the air pressure inside of the sleeve serving as an input for the action on the screen. At the time, the device came with a very cursed 3D animated game called Nurse Nicci, about getting a POV blowjob. 

Almost 20 years later, Machulis gives the Interactive Fleshlight a new, even more cursed life as a controller for Trombone Champ. 

Hudson Mohawke himself noticed Machulis’ tweet of the video of him vigorously stroking out the arrhythmic notes to his song, and retweeted it, calling it “Legendary shit.” 

Holy Wow’s Twitter account responded to say “nudge your record label plz,” so if “Cbat” shows up in the official Trombone Champ game soon, players will have Machulis’ bizarre Franken-Fleshlight to thank for it.