In an era when social media have cheapened the word “friend,” 12 Portland women have created something special that not only defines the word but has survived the test of time and life. It all began more than 50 years ago when three mothers, all college graduates and weary of having their lives defined by raising young children, started a book club as a way to remain intellectually engaged.
They asked nine other mothers to join. They all made a commitment to read selected books and then meet the fourth Thursday of the month, nine months a year – taking a break when the kids were out of school on summer vacation – to discuss the book.
It’s still going strong.
Some early members died. A couple dropped out after being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Half are widows and several have husbands dealing with health issues. When a member dies or is no longer able to attend, club members talk about who to add, always keeping the group at 12. Eight of the initial 12 still participate.
Leah Nepom calls herself a newcomer. She’s 91 and has been in the group for 35 years. Married for 66 years, she lost her husband five years ago. She said the women in the book club have been her support system.
“They insisted I go to dinner with them even when I did not want to,” she said. “I’ve moved to assisted living. One of the women picks me up for each meeting. This club is my connection to the outside word.”
Some of have suffered the tragedy of having a child die. They’ve watched family members experience success and disappointment, joy and pain.
“We’ve seen it all,” said Jody Klevit, 86, one of the three founders. “We have different political viewpoints and different lives. But the one constant for all of us is kindness and friendship of what we call the sisterhood.”
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Klevit, Eva Rickles, 91, and Toinette Menashe, 89, met because their husbands, all doctors, worked at OHSU Hospital. The three men kept running into each other at the Carnival Restaurant.
Long gone and now a parking lot, it was at the base of the road leading to the hospital and a favorite lunch spot for physicians. The men began socializing after work and eventually introduced their wives to each other.
“We all had little kids and our minds were falling asleep,” Klevit said. “We thought about taking a class in English literature at Portland State University. But it was $60 a credit, and we decided to do it ourselves.”
Menashe said they came up with the idea of a book club, reached out to friends and launched it with “Justine.” The 1957 novel by Lawrence Durrell is set before World War II in Alexandria, the Egyptian city that once housed the world's greatest library and whose inhabitants are dedicated to knowledge.
That book, selected by Menashe, set the tone for the next five decades.
“We decided we were not going to focus on bestsellers,” Menashe said. “All of us have a real love of reading and discussion.”
The 12 women took – and take -- the club seriously.
The woman who selects the month’s book leads a review and a discussion. Besides reading the book, members bring to the meeting experiences from their lives and further research into the author and topic.
The secret to the club’s longevity, the women believe, is the structure and rules: Just women. Talk focuses on the books. Social time is reserved for lunch.
They take turns meeting at each other’s homes. In the early days, meetings wrapped up so the mothers could return homes before their children were let out of school. They still keep to that strict schedule.
The group has read 450 books over the past 50 years. Each woman who hosts the meeting tells the group what her selection will be – fiction, non-fiction, history, biography, classics and some esoteric books few readers in this day and age may have encountered:
-- “A World of Strangers” by Nadine Gordimer, a 1958 novel set Johannesburg, South Africa, that explores the wealthy white suburbs and the impoverished black townships.
-- “The Human Element,” by Edward Lewis Wallant, a 1960 novel about an immigrant plumber facing the loss of his wife.
-- “Their Eyes Were Watching God,” a 1937 novel by Zora Neale Hurston, an African American writer whose book has been described as a seminal piece of work in both African American and women’s literature.
Some books are praised more than others. No matter, the act of reading and discussing the work is akin to being in a classroom back in college where the goal was to learn and grow.
“We matured during the women’s movement,” said Rene Holzman, 82. “We were all college- educated yet were mired in diapers, chicken pox and colds. We felt the conflict about being homebound. Our outlet, once a month, was this group.”
Natalie Linn, who joined when a member died, calls herself – at age 78 – the baby of the group.
“I could tell any women in this group what is in my heart,” she said.
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The final chapter of this book of theirs is being written.
One woman, who has a difficult time reading because of eye problems, offered to quit because she couldn’t keep up with the group. The club members refused to accept her resignation and one member picks her up for each meeting and takes her back home at the end.
The group doesn’t plan to add new members, even when one dies. The group will shrink. None of their daughters or daughters-in-law have any interest in carrying on the legacy.
Klevit understands.
“We hungered for intellectual stimulation that just wasn’t available for women at one time,” she said. “Now, young women work, they raise children and they juggle all kinds of activities not there for us.”
The end, the group knows, is approaching.
“We’ve all talked about it,” Kelvit said. “We’re realistic. We’re not going to keep this going.”
But until that day, there are books to read, ideas to share and friendships to nurture, all on the last Thursday of the month.
--Tom Hallman Jr.
thallman@oregonian.com; 503 221-8224
@thallmanjr