Mike Pence would still like to be president one day. Mike Pence has less chance of being president than you do, unless you're Ron DeSantis (and if you are, what the hell are you doing in this shebeen, anyway? Make sure he pays cash).
The primary reason Pence will not be president is that nobody wants to vote for him. There are a number of reasons for this. The dedicated Trumpists won't vote for him because he refused to commit sedition on January 6, 2021. Other people will not vote for him because he accepted the vice presidency from a president* who defiled the office. Other people will not vote for him because they live in Indiana, and they remember how much they didn't like Pence as their governor. Still more people will not vote for him because he is a god-struck empty suit, who if he ever had an original idea, it died of loneliness and despair.
For example, here he is on Fox News, arguing against any criminal action aimed at his former boss because...Christmas.
"I hope the Justice Department understands the magnitude of the very idea of indicting a former president of the United States. I think that would be terribly divisive in the country at a time when the American people want to see us heal. At this time of year, we're all thinking about the most important things in our lives: our faith, our family. And my hope is, the Justice Department think very carefully before proceeding."
I know I will be unenthusiastic about decking the halls, donning my gay apparel, and striking the harp to join the chorus because of my concern about the former president*'s legal problems. I'm glad Mike Pence is taking up the cause of those of us whose entire joy of the season is tied up with that being celebrated down at Mar-a-Lago. Whatta guy!
Charles P Pierce is the author of four books, most recently Idiot America, and has been a working journalist since 1976. He lives near Boston and has three children.
