Steven Seagal has long been involved in the creation of truly banging music, but typically the martial artist, director, and distinguished actor has been the one composing the songs, not having his garbage TV appearances remixed for them.
Inspired by Seagal’s recent Good Morning Britain segment (in which, among many other things, the incredibly relevant action star claims to “have risked [his] life countless times for the American flag”), Funny Or Die has bypassed the buckets of bullshit steadily dribbling from the nexus of his wiggling goatee to center on one element: the incredible way Seagal pronounces the name of “one of the world’s greatest rulers,” Vladimir Putin.
Resulting track “Vladimir Putin” is attributed to “Russian DJ Evil Seagal” and is accompanied by a short music video, its ’90s good times techno beat drumming atop shots of a dancing Putin, meet-and-greets between the two BFFs, and close-ups of the mouth (and itchy nose) responsible for the wonderful “I just got back from a year abroad” pronunciation of the Russian name.
The original interview is a whole lot to deal with, a deranged dialogue that somehow makes Piers Morgan look almost decent in comparison to his completely irrelevant guest. Amidst the nonsense, it’s incredible that anything of value can be salvaged, but that’s exactly what the track is: a spark of light within the darkness. Cup it in your hands and keep it safe.