How To Buy Her A Sex Toy

Why You Need To Suck Up Your Pride And Buy Her A Bedroom Toy

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This article is part of a series on the best sex toys out there. We have also reviewed the best sex toys for men -- including the best masturbation toys -- as well as for women and couples. Take the guesswork out of choosing a sex toy, and above all, have fun.

But of course, you can't just show up to her place armed with a bag full of vibrators and bondage toys to try. And breaking out a magic wand or cock ring mid act is probably going to make things pretty weird, too. Sex toys aren't the type of thing that you can just slip in (see what I did there?). Experts agree that there needs to be a conversation had beforehand -- and not while the two of you are in bed together post coitus.  

"Whenever you want to try something new in bed, talk about it outside of bed," says relationship expert April Masini. That way there’s no pressure and if one of you rejects the idea, it’s less a rejection of sex than it is of the actual new device." So, how should you frame the conversation?

According to Masini, your best bet is to do your homework, and make sure you know about all the benefits of the toy that you're suggesting the two of you use. "Like anything you’re trying to sell, start with why you think it would be good for the person you’re selling," she says. "In other words, make the pitch be all about the other person!"

Luckily, we've done the work for you. We've rounded up some of the top sex toys out there on the market, and laid out all the pros of each one. Whether you're looking to start small with a sex accessory, a toy that you can both use together, or one for your partner to fly solo with, we've got some suggestions that are sure to make your girl pretty happy.

Toys To Increase Pleasure During Sex

If your partner is into the idea of you using a toy on her during the act (there are some incredible sex toys for women on the market), or if the two of you are interested in options that stimulate both your private parts simultaneously (yes, such magic exists), here are a few adult toys to consider that are easy to operate, and get the job done.

Eva Couples Hands Free Personal Massager

Best For: The woman who needs extra clit stimulation to reach the big “O”.

Typically, using a sex toy means that you're taking turns. And of course, it's hot to watch your partner react to all the stimulation of the toy you're using on her. But we don't blame you for wanting to get in on the action. The solution? A couples vibrator that stimulates both of you. The Eva Couples vibrator is designed to be worn during intercourse, and it fits right under your partner's labia. Meaning, both parties get to enjoy the sensation it gives off. Plus, it stays put, no matter what position you and your partner shift to.
$89.46 at Amazon.com

The Rabbit

Best For: The pop culture junkie that remembers this OG vibrator from its iconic role on Sex in the City.

There's a 99.9% chance your girl has heard of "The Rabbit." Made popular by Sex and the City’s Charlotte York, the Rabbit is ideal for both beginners and seasoned pros. The Iconic Rabbit features a rotating shaft, and vibrating tickler for extra clitoral stimulation. Plus, it comes with a year long warranty, just in case you two love birds wear it out. The Rabbit vibrator is the ultimate beginner's toy, tried and loved by many, so unlike, say, anal beads or kegel balls, it's a great introductory sex toy.
$32.95 at AdamEve.com

Waterproof Finger Vibrator

Best For: The girl who loves to do it whenever the mood strikes her -- whether that means doing the dirty while getting clean in the shower or in the back of a cab.

Once you start using sex toys with your partner, you'll want to have easy access to the amped up pleasure they bring wherever you end up doing the dirty -- whether it's in a hot tub on a romantic getaway, or when the mood strikes you in the back of a cab. This vibrator is discreet and easy to carry along wherever the night or weekend takes you. Plus, it's waterproof, meaning you can use it to add to your shower sex routine. It's designed to target her clitoris with ultra-pleasurable sensations.
$11.73 at Amazon.com

Fantasy Door Swing

Best For: The adventurous, “try anything once” woman who thrives on tackling new positions.

Think about how much fun swinging on a swing was back in your playground days. Now imagine combining that with sex. What a time to be alive, am I right? Using a sex swing opens you up to a whole new world of sex position opportunities. If you're thinking, 'that seems like it'd be uncomfortable,' you're wrong. With a padded seat to keep whoever's on the bottom nice and comfy, and super easy setup (all you need is sturdy door in your house to get this baby rocking), there's no reason not to be swinging your partner to the big O on the regular.
$26.77 at Amazon.com

Toys To Masturbate With

This section is full of toys (from g-spot vibrators to kegel balls) that your partner can use on her own, when she's missing you. Or while the two of you are having steamy FaceTime sex. Or for her to use when she's teasing you with dirty Snapchats. Basically, what I'm trying to say is that these are gifts you'll also most definitely benefit from.

Rechargeable Magic Wand

Best For: The lady who likes it slow and sensual -- and always begs you for a back massage.

If this is the first wand (or for that matter, sex toy) that your partner has ever owned and operated, you'll want to go with something that's a step down from the LELO, and more user-friendly. This magic wand features (a more manageable) four vibration settings, with a simple on/off switch, for maximum stimulation of the clitoris. It's also rechargeable, and reaches full power after just three hours of being plugged in. It's a solid beginner sex toy, and an ideal introduction into the magic world of wands.
$95.00 at Amazon.com

Crystal Heart Of Glass Dildo

Best For: The girl who likes sparkly things and orgasms (read: all women).

Very few sex toys can double as a statement decor piece, but this glass dildo manages to achieve both. Not only is it beautifully made, but it's carefully crafted to maximize pleasure, thanks to the bulbs featured on the shaft of the dildo. Your partner can even experiment with different temperatures to see what feels good by running this toy under hot or cold water. If g-spot simulation is her best bet to orgasm, this dildo deserves your consideration.
$23.47 at Amazon.com

Power Bullet Mini Vibrator

Best For: The always on-the-go woman who gets shit done effectively.

Another ideal toy for a first time user. If the true-to-size vibrators and dildos feel too intimidating for your partner, get her something small that packs just as much of a punch. Slightly over two inches long, this mini pocket vibrator is single speed, battery powered and easy to operate. It's also waterproof, which makes it a breeze to clean.
$7.05 at Amazon.com

Scarlet Couture Glass Ben Wa Balls

Best For: The woman who’s always trying to get you to try that thing from Fifty Shades of Grey.

There was really no escaping that whole Fifty Shades Of Grey phenomenon. So whether your girl read the books or got herself off to the steamy trailer, chances are she'll know what you're presenting her when you break out these Ben Wa Balls. They're used to strengthen kegels, and increase the power of the pelvic floor. And they feel pretty incredible when they’re in you (trust me). These one inch balls are ideal for beginners. Plus, they come with a handle, so that they won't get lost...up there.
$20.00 at AdamEve.com

Toys For Teasing Your Partner

Foreplay is a key component to a quality sex life, so you'll want to invest in a few toys that take teasing your partner to the next level. Here are the best toys for getting her turned on before the act.

Little Black Thong

Best For: The lady who loves it when you buy her lingerie.

The only thing that could possibly be hotter than having a guy buy you lingerie is for said lingerie to come with a built in mini vibrator — giving him total control over your sexual pleasure. Yes, this is a thing that exists. The vibrator hides inside the panty liner, meaning people will be none the wiser about her wearing it, and it can be controlled from up to 19 feet away. Pro tip: Play with this one out in a public setting. Being turned on without being able to go at it with each other will build up sexual tension that's earth shattering once it finally gets released. 
$33.21 at Amazon.com

Carejoy Feather Tickler Spanking Whip

Best For: The delicate lady who has a secret kinky side.

The situation: She wants to try using a whip, but you both want to test the waters with something that isn't so intimidating and hardcore. A happy medium would be to find a whip that doesn't hurt (if you don't want it to) like this feather tickler. It can be used to tease your partner, or you can put some muscle behind it to give her a solid spank. Three cheers for versatility.
$8.99 at Amazon.com

Under The Bed Restraints

Best For: The woman who loves it when you pin her down while you’re going at it.

You've tried out the tape and the handcuffs, and you're ready for something more intense. Or, you want to skip the small stuff and go right for the big leagues. These under the bed restraints will take things up a notch — made with velcro fasteners that are easily removed. Plus, the simple setup means more time spent acting out your bondage fantasy. 
$16.29 at Amazon.com

Three Bump Silicone Anal Butt Plug

Best For: The butt stuff enthusiast looking to take things to the next level.

So, your partner wants to play around with butt plugs. One of the weirdest things about starting to use this kind of toy is sticking something in your butt and leaving it there. The solution? A butt plug with a handle. This one features three varying sizes, so that you can play around with different fits until she finds the right one.
$9.00 at Amazon.com

Sex Accessories

So they're not necessarily sex toys. But adding a few simple sex accessories to your arsenal is an easy way to shake things up without investing $200 in a vibrating magic wand. Here are a few key recommendations.

Intimate Earth Adventure Anal Relaxing Serum for Her

Best For: he first-time anal explorer looking to dip her toe into the world of butt stuff.

So, you've been given the green light to enter her backdoor. Obviously, you want to make the experience as pleasant as possible, so that this becomes part of your repertoire instead of just a one time thing. If that's the case, an anal serum that helps relax the other hole will help that cause. This one also happens to be organic, in case your girl is into going green.
$.00 at Amazon.com

RingO Pleasure Ring

Best For: The lady who loves to be on top, whose bedroom catchphrase is “Don’t stop.”

It might seem like a cock ring wouldn't benefit your partner. But in addition to that ring providing extra stimulation for her clit, truth is you're also wearing an accessory proven to keep your boner game strong throughout — a welcome advantage. And at three bucks? You can't beat the price.
$7.57 at Amazon.com

Clit Sensitizer Lube

Best For: The girl who has multiple orgasm goals (spoiler: all of us).

If you're looking for a no frills, easy way to give your girl more pleasure, this clit sensitizer lube will do the trick. Spread a small amount on her clit to make her most sensitive part even more stimulated. The result? A more intense orgasm than she's ever experienced before.
$13.40 at Amazon.com

ZIOOER Fetish Vibrating Ring

Best For: The woman who wants it quick and easy -- no frills, just efficiency.

Cock rings are awesome and extremely easy to use. What's better than that? Cock rings that vibrate, providing extra clitoral stimulation for her (glad you asked). This one is easy to operate, and since it's made out of silicone it slides right on. Plus, it comes with it's own little battery.
$13.00 at Amazon.com