Lulu: Girls & Bathrooms
Lulu Poll: The Truth About Women And Bathrooms (Spoiler: They Use Them & It's No Big Deal)
Are you wondering what she’s really thinking? You’re about to find out. This is the last in a series of four articles stemming from studies Lulu conducted where they polled women on topics relating to sex and relationships. You can see more polls like this by downloading the free Lulu app for men in the App Store or on Google Play.Everybody poops. This isn’t news by any means. But never is this daily deposit made more of an issue than when a woman has to go at her boyfriend’s place. This was news to me when I was introduced to a poll by Lulu, an app that provides female-user-generated dude-reviews in order to determine whether or not he’s worth a woman’s time. This particular poll was created when a Lulu member asked their sex and relationship columnist, “The Dude” if she was making too much an issue of going to “elaborate lengths” in order to avoid using the bathroom at her partner’s place.
His advice, of course, was yes. Yes she is. Not that she should “invite him in to inspect the damage [she’s] inflicted on the porcelain, but for the love of god, stop holding it.” And he’s right. Jack Morin, a doctor of the derrière and author of Anal Health and Pleasure, pleads that you never “hold it in.” Ignoring your biological urge to pinch (even farts) can cause serious damage to your internal sphincter, whose primary job is to deliver effortless bowel movements. If the sphincter does become damaged, almost every bowel movement from then on will require straining and pushing. Which can then easily lead to hemorrhoids — admittedly, much less attractive than knowing you’ve defecated in your boyfriend's home.
After being introduced to the idea that some women are apprehensive of pooping in male company, I browsed articles to make certain this is a widespread concern among ladies, and not just a rare instance (hard-hitting journalism, I know). In no time, I found this was a much-discussed issue. There are tons of stories likening pooping near a guy (especially one you’re dating) as “horrifying” and even a “feminist issue.” There are even “how-to” articles for doing the deed without your partner noticing.
As a guy, I don’t relate to this apprehension. Not only that, but I would have never expected a woman to have these concerns. Our genders are different, sure, but we’re human, and, pardon the pun: shit happens.
In fact, one thing that all of these personal stories had in common was that when the apprehensive woman finally did drop trou, the man wasn’t bothered by it in the slightest. Yet, for some reason it remains an issue — but only among women.
This brings me back to the results of Lulu’s poll, which asked: Does using the bathroom at a guy’s house freak you out? Half of respondents answered “Maybe at first,” which I guess is natural, but further proof we need to alter the female opinion. Second, at 21%, were the ladies who understand and are at peace with biology, answering: “No, it’s natural.” Followed closely by “it completely freaks me out — I always go home to do my business” at 19%, and “Well, I’m not going to use the yard!” at 11%.
Ladies, (and I can admit I never thought I’d say this): Go poo. Don’t harm your sphincter because you think your guy will be grossed out. He won’t be. I have had friends who have photographed their feces and audio recorded their own farts, for crying out loud (men are gross). But we’re mature now (well, most of us are) and there’s no need to hide behind clenched butt cheeks and an unfair double standard.
Be sure to check out the first three articles in the series to learn what she's thinking about manscaping, hooking up and your relationship with your mother.
Got an opinion on the subject? Let us know what you think in the comments below.
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