You might want to take a seat for this.
For years, people have debated the answer to one incredibly important question: is the chocolate on a chocolate biscuit on top of the biscuit part? Or the bottom?
Obviously, we’ve always reassured ourselves that the chocolate is on the top.
That’s the way we hold our biscuits – chocolate side up. We held this knowledge like a security blanket, believing that even if the world was turning upside down, at least our biscuits weren’t doing the same.
But it turns out we were wrong. Everything we once believed in has been shattered.
We’re so sorry.
Our journey to this heartbreaking discovery began with a Facebook post.
One woman shared a photo to McVitie’s Facebook wall, asking: ‘Which is the top of this yummy mcvites chocolate hobnob?? The chocolatey side or the nobby side??’
While fans of biscuits swiftly answered that of COURSE the chocolate was on top, McVitie’s swooped in to destroy everything we thought to be true.
‘Hi, our Hobnobs goes through a reservoir of chocolate,’ wrote McVitie’s. ‘So it’s on the bottom! Thanks, McVitie’s.’
Holy f***.
At this point we refused to believe it could be true.
Perhaps a member of McVitie’s social media team had just quit. Perhaps they wanted to go out in a blaze of flames and crumbs.
So we reached out to McVitie’s HQ to find out the truth. Because we had to know.
We had to know if we’ve been holding our biscuits the wrong way up. We had to know the truth about what we’ve been shovelling in our mouths. We had to know if this ‘chocolate on the bottom’ nonsense applied to innocent digestives or Jaffa Cakes, too, or if Chocolate Hobnobs alone are responsible for this madness.
The answer: yes, the chocolate truly is on the bottom of McVitie’s biscuits, not the top.
Kerry Owens, McVitie’s Marketing Director, told metro.co.uk: ‘When we make our McVitie’s chocolate biscuits – whether that be Chocolate Hobnobs, Chocolate Digestives, or even Jaffa Cakes – they go through a reservoir of chocolate on the production line.
‘This essentially “enrobes” the bottom in chocolate – so we can confirm that the chocolate is officially on the bottom of the biscuits.’
This. Is. Shocking.
What now, McVitie’s? Should we still dip our biscuits in tea? Or should we pour the tea on the biscuits?
Everything has changed. Our worlds will never be the same. We have been shaken to our very cores.
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